Counseling for Couples Struggling with Communication and Emotional Distance
In-person Couples Counseling in St. Louis & St. Charles, MO
Virtual available across Missouri
It’s 2 am and you’re still spinning from the argument that happened hours ago.
You keep replaying the conversation, trying to figure out what went wrong. Again.
Something’s off in the way you and your partner communicate. You don’t know exactly what, but you know this can’t keep happening.
You’re on the same team,
you just can’t see it.
Stop me if this sounds like your relationship:
One of you needs to regulate your emotions when conflict hits.
You’re thinking, “Get away from me. I need a moment to breathe. Right now, talking isn’t helping anything.”
But instead of saying that, you shut down. You spiral into self-shame.
You read into things that aren’t actually being said.
You think, “My partner doesn’t care that I need space,”
But you never told them you needed space.
You just needed to not feel like a failure for once.
You fear vulnerability, and deep down, you’re afraid you’re not enough.
The other partner?
You want to fix things right now.
You’re thinking, “Why don’t they care? If they did, they’d stay and talk. Running away just proves they don’t love me.”
But beneath that urgency is fear.
Fear that you’re too much.
Fear that your emotions are inconvenient.
Fear that the love you want so badly… is slipping away.
You’re caught in a painful pattern where one of you shuts down and the other pushes harder.
And the harder you both try to feel safe, the more disconnected you become.
It’s not that you don’t love each other.
You do.
But this cycle?
It’s exhausting.
You don’t want to feel resentment.
You don’t want to feel alone.
You don’t want to walk away.
But staying like this? That doesn’t feel good either.
It’s time to fix the real problem —
the one underneath the arguments.
This is where introspective couples work comes in.
This isn’t surface-level conflict resolution. We go deeper.
Together, we’ll explore the emotional roots of your patterns—why you both react the way you do and how those reactions are protecting you, even as you push your partner away.
We’ll work with both of you—as individuals and as a couple.
You’ll each have the space to explore your side of the story while also learning how to show up for your partner in the moments they need you most.
You’ll learn how to talk so your partner can actually hear you.
You’ll begin to recognize what’s happening beneath the surface—your triggers, your fears, your hopes.
You’ll practice new ways of interacting that foster deeper connection instead of disconnection.
We’re not here to decide who’s right or wrong.
That’s not what healing is about.
We’re here to understand the why—and change the how.
This work is about more than fixing fights.
It’s about remembering why you chose each other in the first place.
During this process, you’ll:
Rediscover the “why” of your relationship.
Learn how to ask the right questions to stay connected.
Feel heard and seen in ways you didn’t know were possible.
Begin building trust again—together.
What if your relationship felt like a “get to” instead of a “have to”?
What if you didn’t have to brace for impact every time something hard came up?
What if you felt like teammates again?
If you’re reading this, some part of you still believes in the relationship.
Even if it’s messy.
Even if it hurts.
Even if it’s hanging on by a thread.
That belief is your starting point.
Let’s find a better way to be in this together.
Imagine being able to say what you’re feeling—and actually be understood.
Imagine fighting less, laughing more, and feeling like teammates again.
Imagine believing, “We’ll make it through this.”
Let’s stop spinning our wheels.
Let’s do something different—together.